Life Goals

So, the topic for my blog today is kind of a big idea.

Remember my boyfriend got that A- that he was so happy about? Well, he got an email today telling him that there'd been a mathematical error and he'd actually only gotten a B+. (Needless to say he was really upset yada yada, but in the end it was all resolved and they ended up changing it back to an A-, yay!). During my attempts to cheer him up we started talking about our goals for our lives over the next ten years, and we each choose three important things. Mine were...

1. To be graduate from law school successfully and get a good job in a related field.

2. To remain healthy, slim and strong.

3. To be in a happy, successful relationship (hopefully married and hopefully to my incredible boyfriend).

I also read a slightly morbid article called "How the Top Five Regrets of the Dying Can Aid the Living":

1.“I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”

2. “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.”

3. “I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.”

4. “I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.”

5. “I wish that I had let myself be happier.”

My thoughts:

1. I try to do this and one of my goals of this blog is to use it to reflect on what is important to me.

2. Haha, if only. That said, over the last year and a half I have tried to redress my work-life balance. I've tried to exercise more, I've made more time for my friends and the boyfriend and I are trying to make time for regular date-nights.

3. I try to do this. In some ways, I'm great at doing this. I'm good at telling my boyfriend and some other people how I feel. But, I do want to try to speak up a bit more about certain things (little things, like changing meeting times and locations). Often if you ask for things, you get them and generally there isn't much of a downside.

4. I'm not sure how I feel about this one. I do still stay in touch with one of my closest friends from high school (Kirst), but I'm not too close with most of the rest of them though. In part it's because I'm doing such different things from most of them (most of them are working now because their degrees were only three years. Mine's 4 and then I'm doing another 3 of law school).

5. I'm not sure I get this one? I don't try to restrict myself from being happy at all and I'm always on the lookout for more ways of making myself happy.

Well, that's all from me! Tomorrow you'll get lots of photos from my Connecticut trip!

Last three weeks!

So, the last three weeks have been incredibly busy for me (which is also why my blog has been so neglected :( ). My college has exams after Christmas, which is a bit unusual. At first I wasn't sure about it, but it's (mostly) grown on me. It still feels a bit tough coming back from Christmas and feeling like you've forgotten everything, but I also think it's worth it not to have exams before Christmas!

Anyway, my first week and a half back was studying/writing my one super short (1000 word) optional paper. After that I had exams - I had two take homes (for psych and politics) and two in class exams (art and econ). I used to really like take homes, but now I just find them annoying (Professors really only assign a take home final if they want you to spend more than three hours on it). Regardless, my two take homes went fine and my two in class ones went okay, but not great.

I've also gotten back two of my grades (in psych and politics) and I'm really pleased with them: I got 2 A's :D. My first two years were academically and socially challenging, so my GPA hasn't been too happy since then. I'd love to graduate with a 3.4, which means that I need a 3.7 average this year, so I'm now well on my way to that!

In other grade news, the boyfriend got an A- in politics (his major!). He's struggled much much more than I have with grades, and has only ever got 1 A and 1A-, so this is a big deal for him! I'm so proud :D.

We have a week off between semesters, but I'm staying at school to work on my thesis (as is the boyfriend, which is nice). I went into lab yesterday and apparently my lab bench is no longer mine. In my lab there are good benches and bad benches, and after having a bad one for 6 months I got a good one over the summer, which I've had since then. However, we have a new grad student in lab ( who is technically senior to me) and apparently my boss (Professor) just decided to move all my stuff and give him my bench. It does sort of make sense (he is more senior than me, and I'll only be in lab for another 3 months), but still! I was really hurt that no-one told me and it made me feel very undervalued. After talking to my best friend about it yesterday I've decided that I'm just going to work really really hard on the thesis and hope it all turns out okay.

In better news, having a week with the boyfriend is bliss! For the last two evenings we've cooked - we made chili con carne and rice on Friday and a asian chicken stir fry last night, both of which have been very yummy! We also made it to the gym yesterday, and I did his biceps/triceps workout with him, which was seriously tough! (And I'm feeling it today!). Anyway, hopefully the rest of the week will be filled with those kinds of things instead of lab bench stealing type things!

New Years Resolutions

So...it's 2012. It still hasn't quite sunk in.

2012 is going to be a big year for me with a lot of important changes, most notably that I'm graduating from college and starting law school. There are going to be lots more changes associated with those things:

• Not having the boyfriend around 24/7 (I'm going to law school, he's going...somewhere else, as of yet undecided, but almost certainly not the sleepy little town I'm going to be living in).
• Having to live in my own apartment (it's just not going to be the same as living in a dorm room).
• Cooking for myself (I can't wait to do this, but it's also going to be a big job!)
• And tonnes more things that I just haven't though of yet I'm sure!

Anyway, as always I've made a bunch of resolutions for this year (but, also as always I'm going to keep changing them around and being undecided and adding things for about a week):

• Blog resolutions:
• Blog three times a week and actually use my twitter account! (I just got it and it's all shiny and new - http://twitter.com/#!/jinxsjourney!)
• Post more pictures on my blog (at least once a week!)

• Personal Goals
• Learn the location of a new country every day (I already missed this one yesterday, but I'll do 2 today!). I know this is really weird, but I'm pretty terrible at knowing where countries are in the world (I realised yesterday I'm not even sure if I could point out some big/important counties like Japan...not good!).
• Write 52 letters/postcards.
• Run 6 "official" 5Ks

• Not failing at life resolutions (ie things I need to do to graduate from college)
• Find a summer internship
• Finish my thesis (actually do stuff in lab)
• Graduate with closer to a 3.4 than a 3.3 (I'm at 3.33 at the moment, so this will hopefully work out!)

• Couple Resolutions (with the boyfriend, obviously)
• Try to reduce sugar intake - only eat dessert at one meal/day
• Work out a minimum of 3 times a week
• Go out for a meal together at least once every three weeks
• Sleep together twice a week (sorry, I know that's TMI)
• One self-improvement type thing each month (chosen by the other person)

Thanksgiving! (Properly!)

As I said before, I spent Thanksgiving with my family which was wonderful! There were a few tensions between my sister and me (more on that at some other point), but otherwise it was great.

I took the train down late Wednesday night and got picked up a the station by my Mum and Grandmother. The journey was fine, but obviously the trains were all super crowded and I was running late etc etc. I'm also a nervous traveller (not normally with trains though), but the presence of lots of armed police and police dogs on the trains didn't exactly make me feel super relaxed.

On Thursday we headed into NY to go to the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade, which is a *huge* parade through NY with giant balloons and floats with people dancing/singing/ice skating/all sorts of other crazy things.





This was the first photo I took all day and it's my favourite one! I just find random floating pumpkins hilarious!



I really really really HATE McDonalds (it's pretty much evil incarnate in my eyes), but I like the picture!



...and I like this picture too




Another picture that I find ridiculously amusing. I have no idea who these kids are but it's a) health and safety gone mad and b) something that my parents would've done if they'd thought of it when we were younger!

We also, of course, had traditional Thanksgiving food which was delicious! (And I ate wayyy too much!) (I thought I had a picture of my Thanksgiving dinner somewhere but I can't find it. Maybe it was on Dad's camera).

On Friday we headed into NY again, but this time to see the Rockettes. It was the first time I'd ever seen them and they were so incredible!

The Rockettes were incredible! If anyone ever gets the opportunity to see them definitely go!

I really liked this chandelier in Radio City Music Hall (the theater)!

Plus: there was lots of Christmassy stuff in NY. The Rockettes are also a Christmas show so those two things put me into the Christmas mood! (I'm listening to Christmas music now...it's almost December!)

Christmas Trees in NY!

There was also the most beautiful sunset when we got back to my grandmother's home, so I took a bunch of pictures of that!

Saturday was my sister's birthday. (She's turning 20). I also had a terrible skin allergic reaction to something (I think putting my facewash on dry instead of wet?!), so that put me in a bit of a bad mood. (TMI but the skin on my face all started peeling off).

I also had a super yummy/intense salad for lunch:

I travelled back to college on Sunday. The journey was much better than it could've been and I got to meet up with my boyfriend in NY, which always makes things easier (someone to carry my bags. Hehe.).

So now...just back to the grind of school for another three weeks. I've been finding it a bit difficult to settle back in/motivate myself, but today's been a good (better) day with work and a less bad day for food :).

My sister and now...the boyfriend

My sister still hasn't worked out what her "illness X" is. Over the summer she was diagnosed with a couple of parasites. In people who aren't ill they don't treat them, because they're generally considered to be pretty minor, but because my sister was so ill they decided to treat. After the treatment she was feeling much better, and we all thought we'd solved it. But...a few weeks later she had midterms. She was stressed and not sleeping enough and all her symptoms came rushing back. (TMI warning!) Her doctor freaked out a few weeks ago because apparently there was blood in her stool, which is never a good thing. The doctor ordered an emergency colonoscopy, which I'm still waiting to hear the results of. She was also gluten free for a while (one of her many doctors diagnosed her with a wheat allergy), but someone else has now told her that she should have seen an improvement by now, so she's coming off that diet. (Which is great, I already think she's too thin.) She's also been seeing a counselor type to deal with some of the psychological aspects of this whole thing - she's understandably been finding it incredibly difficult to deal with all this while at college, and is also feeling like she's wasting her college years. Anyway, I will keep you all updated with any (fingers crossed!) improvements.

My boyfriend has also suffered from stomach issues for a long time (since way before we were together), but they seem to be getting worse. He saw a doctor in the UK who put him on an elimination diet, called FODMAP. Essentially, it cuts out everything but protein and some vegetables (ie no wheat, no dairy, cuts out a lot of fruit). At the same time he had a blood test, which showed abnormally (worryingly) high uric acid and creatine (indicating, according to the doctor, muscle death). The diet is meant to be 8 weeks long, so we're just getting to the reintroduction stage (which is good!). However, he had another blood test last week and the uric acid and creatine are still high, and he apparently now has high bilirubin, which is a by product of blood breakdown. The doctor at our health services is now very worried about his kidneys and has referred him to a kidney specialist for an ultrasound. He's going to have that on Friday. It would be really really tough on us and him if there was something serious. I really doubt there is, as this thing's never showed up on any previous blood tests, but it's still nerve wracking (and obviously kidney's are pretty important).

Anyway, as usual, I feel like I'm completely in the epicenter of all this stuff. I'm really hoping that all my sisters issues get resolved soon, and also that this whole thing with the boyfriend turns out to be not as serious as everyone seems to think it is at the moment :S.

Things I love

I decided I wanted to do a post on ten of my favourite things (in no particular order, and by no means a complete list), with (some) pictures!

1. My family: my mum, dad, sister, brother, grandmother

2. My gorgeous boyfriend

3. My dogs

(The two above are of my wonderful puppy. (He's really not a puppy any more). He's 11 (almost 11 and a half) and he's a border collie).

(This is a silly picture of our other dog, which is appropriate given what a ridiculous creature she is! She's almost 11, but still acts like a puppy and everyone thinks she's one! She's also a border collie. Our two dogs are cousins!)

4. Nature/The Outdoors/Flowers!

I mentioned this earlier, but when I was younger I loved gardening. I recently got back into taking pictures so I have lots of flowers (they're easy to photograph)!

(These are from a set of gardens near my home)

(Lots of pictures of flowers!)

5. College, and my particular University! We have such an awesome environment here, and so many people work to make that possible. (There is someone in particular whose made such a difference to me. He works in our "academic support center", which holds a bunch of seminars on various seminars on procrastination, better note taking, exam prep etc. In the first seminar I went to, he talked a little about peoples emotions blocking their ability to work, which really run a bell with me because I did used to get really upset and feel useless if I didn't get a good grade on it. He was the person that recommended ACT to me to deal with that issue, and that's been one of the things thats changed my life).

6. The gym! And a supermarket near school that has tonnes of organic, natural produce. (Both the gym and the supermarket help me on my journey to become happier and healthier).

7. Certain parts of me! I've always hated my legs, but after my recent trips to the gym they're actually looking ok!

8. Thunder and lightning and storms and rain.

(not my picture - from free-extras.com!)

9. Autumn (my favourite season. I don't like the summer so much - it's too hot for me! We also have really really gorgeous autumns here in New England)

10. My phone. It's bad, but I couldn't live without it!

(picture from oriongadgets.com)

Busy Week

Surprisingly, my week has been super busy.

I've been getting up fairly early (7:30 ish) and trying to get to lab before 8:30. I spend alllll day in lab (apart from a lunch break) and then get back between 5:30 and 6. At 7ish, I go to the gym (I've been surprisingly good about going) and when I get back from that I shower and end up starting cooking dinner at 8:45 or 9. By the time I've eaten it's almost time for bed. I've been trying to get to bed earlier, by 11:30 or 12.

I wrote another post about this, and then ended up never posting it, but I actually really like being awake early. It's good to get to lab before everyone else, because it means its easier to get time on the machines I need to use and it's also just generally less crowded. During the school year I never get up early, so this is a bit of a change for me! (I was an early bird at home though!).

I've managed to get to the gym a fair amount recently, which is really good.

I stopped using the nuvaring over the summer (the boyfriend and I agree that there's no point - it's expensive, it's not great for me and because we only use it for birth control, there's no point in using it if we're not together), so I've been slightly anxiously waiting for my period. (When you stop using birth control you have no idea when you're going to get it. For me it also tends to be a bit weird/different when I do get it.). Anyway, I know that no-one really wants to know this, but I've finally got it and it's not fun. (Which is surprising, because normally on or off bc I don't have any problems). I have really bad tummy cramps, which means that I've had to scale back my gym time this week and I've just generally been feeling a bit rotten. Anyway, I got medicine for it so if they start to get bad again I'll just take that!

I'm back...

[This is a looooong post! Feel free to skip bits]

So, as I said in my last post I've been really busy recently. I got back to the US on Monday evening and started lab work on Tuesday. My (super awesome!) best friend, who is also my roommate this summer, moved all my things into my room, but I still had to arrange/unpack everything when I got back.

The plane flight back to the US was kinda stressful - it was delayed by over an hour because of technical difficulty (not exactly a relaxing thing to hear if you already hate flying!) and pretty much every seat on it was taken, which also ups the stress of flying!

Lab
I started lab work on Tuesday, so didn't have a huge amount of time to relax. It was all going fine until my parents decided they didn't like me working on the project I was working on (and I agreed with them). I know that sounds totally ridiculous and like my parents are being way too interfering with my life, but the reason they stepped in is that my project had me working with lead oxide, which is pretty nasty stuff. Lead is a heavy metal which means that once it gets into your body it stays there and you can't (really) get it out. Excess heavy metals in the body have been linked to things like cancer and dementia, so it's sort of serious. Lead oxide is also worse for you than plain old lead, because lead oxide is a fine powder which "poofs" whenever you touch it or move it. [I was wearing a mask whenever I was using it, but of course none of that stuff is 100% effective]. I'm also especially worried because I like in an old English house, which means that the water in my house probably goes through lead pipes. As lead doesn't leave the body, it's entirely possible that I already have a higher lead concentration in my body than someone my age should have.
I talked to my supervisor about it and to say the least he wasn't overly pleased. To be honest I don't really blame him: he thinks its safe and the rest of the people in my lab all handle the stuff occasionally. I'm also the only undergraduate who has changed projects at all, and now I'm going to be changing my project twice. (He's also grading my thesis and is meant to be writing me a letter of recommendation for law school, so I don't really want to make him dislike me...).
Anyway, that whole thing was a bit tough to deal with - I felt caught between him and my parents. I am probably more health conscious than most people in my lab as well, so a lot of other people in my lab thought I was being ridiculous and paranoid. Regardless, the situation is hopefully somewhat resolved now. I'm going to be getting a new project on Monday and I'm just going to have to try really hard to impress my supervisor!

Roomates
My living arrangement for this summer is a three bedroom triple, which means that each of us has our own bedroom. I'm living with my best friend (fingers crossed that that doesn't mess up our friendship, I'm sure it won't) and another girl (Diza), who we're sort of friends with (we needed a third person to fill the triple). Anyway, this other girl is driving me nuts, and I've only lived with her for three days. She's incredibly needy and is an over protected only child. She will literally stand outside my locked bedroom door and talk at me. She insists on doing things like coming into my room and turning on my laptop so that I can hear a song she wants me to hear. She followed me into the bathroom yesterday so she could finish telling me about some inane thing. I don't want to be mean, and I do feel a little sympathetic (I think she's pretty lonely), but seriously! I need some personal space.
The other issue is that she doesn't get me. She's fairly different to me and has no sense of independence. She insists on coming to the gym with me (the gym is kinda my alone space) and she will talk and talk at me when I'm lifting proper weights (so I need to focus). She also refuses to push herself at all - she was lifting 5 lb weights, complaining that they were too light, but refusing to lift more in case she hurts herself. She also complains and complains and complains about how much she's hurting from the gym, which drives me nuts!
She's also working in a lab (not my lab, thank god! Lab is the only time she's not there chattering at me.) and everyone in her lab was sent an online quiz that was meant to determine how empathetic you are and how good you are with other people, reading other people's emotions even when they're hidden etc. She scored 16 or so, if you score below 20 that's a possible sign of autism (because you're that unaware about what other people are thinking/feeling). I scored 72ish (I'm a fairly empathetic person, even if it doesn't seem if from this rant), so clearly it's possible to do "well" on this thing.
Anyway, sorry for the rant, she's just driving me absolutely insane. I know it's not her fault, but she has zilch conception of public space and alone time.

The Boy
I miss him. A lot. It probably doesn't help my mood!

Food/Gym
My food has been okay, but not great. I need to go back to recording my food more. I have been doing okay at the whole high fiber options thing, but I still think I could push it further. Basically, my meals are good and generally very healthy but I eat too much crap and sugar between meals (marshmallows and chocolate), which is really bad (and I just measured my blood sugar - 144 - also really bad).
Tomorrow I am not going to eat chocolate, marshmallows or other candy.
In other food news its really tough to go shopping at school. There are no supermarkets near by. I'm going to try a grocery delivery service, and I've scheduled the delivery for Sunday, so fingers crossed for that!
With regards to exercise, I've been doing okay, but it's a real pain to have to go with this other girl all the time. I find it harder to exercise with her yapping in my ear. I did go swimming (alone) yesterday though, which felt fantastic. I haven't been swimming in ages (despite the fact that I'm meant to go to increase my oxygen transport ability - more on that at some other time).
My heart rate monitor also arrived! I've only used it once so far, but I got a really good workout with it. A few months ago I went to an exercise physiologist who did various tests on me and was able to determine my own max heart rate etc (and that my limitation is the rate at which I can transport oxygen/carbon dioxide from my lungs to my blood). Anyway, what he suggested (for me, this isn't universal) is to get my heart rate to 190+ for two minutes and then come down to 160ish for 2-3 minutes. I tried it on the rotex on Wednesday and it was really good!
I've also decided that I'm going to try to...swim twice a week, do gym-based cardio two or three times a week and lift weights twice a week (and have one rest day!).

Mental Health/Personal Development
I've gotten bad about doing my breathing every night, so I need to get back to doing that. HeartMath, the company I purchased it from, runs various webinars, so I've signed up for one of those on "Better Communication". I'm hoping it'll be interesting.

Resolutions
I'm doing okay with the resolutions. I've been fairly good at wearing sunscreen which is of course a good thing. I've gotten worse about doing my "old" things like taking vitamins and psyllium, so I need to get back to doing those kinds of things.

Tour Guiding
I have my first tour tomorrow! I'm not an official tour guide yet (the tour tomorrow is a practice tour to see if I'm up to scratch!). I'm a bit nervous about it, but fingers crossed! I'm going to spend part of tonight thinking about what I need/want to say! 

Ahh! This was a realllly long post! Sorry about that. Just had a lot I needed to write about!

Today...

Has been a good day.

My boyfriend's 21st is tomorrow, so I got my hair cut (it needed to be cut anyway, and it seemed like a good time to do it!). I got to a pretty tough exercise class today, but it was pretty fun. I've also been trying to decide what dress to wear to the boyfriend's party (occasionally I am a girly girl!). I'm meeting a lot of his friends for the first time (so I want to look a bit "sexy"), his parents will be there (so I don't want to have it all hanging out!) and we're planning to go to a club after (so it's needs to be comfortable/club-esque). I'm trying to decide between a sparkly leopard print dress (which is a a little shorter and makes my boobs look incredible (or as incredible as they ever do)! There's not cleavage or anything on show though) or a black dress (which is tight, almost knee length and gives me an incredible waist (ie it makes me look like I actually have a waist!). On the other hand it's long and black and it is a summer party...)

(And that was a really short post! I guess I really don't do much when I'm on holiday at home!)

Any thoughts?

Roommates

So, the boyfriend and I have had to move rooms for the next week or so. He technically isn't meant to be staying with me, but is. We have two other roommates and we're going to be getting a third one today (which means that my boyfriend won't still be able to stay with me :( ). Anyway, one of the girls has two of her friends staying which is fine, but....

Firstly, they have tonnes of alcohol in the room which is fine, but if the campus police were to find it we'd all be in trouble. Secondly, they're loud and noisy and in the room a lot. We came back last night and found one of the *guests* in our common room, on the floor with a guy, messing around. We went off to shower and came back to find an empty condom wrapper and an unwrapped (used) condom in the bin. I'm not a prude, but I think its a bit much to do that on the floor of a shared common room where you're a guest. Secondly, they woke us up at 8 with their loud talking and giggling. The boyfriend went out at 10 to ask them to be a bit more quiet, and they got better, but not much better.
I also went out into the common room and here was a guy out there, who presumably spent the night. I'm really annoyed at these girls (and our roommate who said they could stay) because they're really not acting with much decorum.

 I'm not entirely sure what to do. On one hand, I do have my boyfriend here and I guess he is a guest here. I have this other roommate coming back today, so I want to stay flexible etc because we might want to try to negotiate and get the others to agree to let him stay in the room. I also don't want to seem old and grumpy and like a party pooper. On the other hand, they're really not behaving with any decorum and disrupting our ability to enjoy reunions.

Does anyone have any advice? How would you all handle this kind of thing?

One down...two to go!

I had my sociology exam today. I'm glad it's over. To be honest, it didn't really feel that much like an exam. It was open notes and open book. and there was very little time pressure. I really really am hoping I did well on it - I really didn't like either of the essay questions though. Neither of them really made that much sense to me :S. Anyway, fingers crossed.

I had a review session for my next exam (engineering) straight after the sociology exam, so now I'm worrying a bit about that. I had another review session for history (with the TA, not Professor) and I'm super worried about that one. We have to write an essay covering from the 1600s to today in Urban planning in the US in 50 minutes! (Along with another 50 minute essay, a 20 minute essay and 12 "identifications" in an hour! Eek!).

I know it's really boring to hear about me studying but that's all I've been doing recently, and all I'll be doing tomorrow and the day after. Come Friday afternoon though, I'm free....to pack up all my belongings and put them in storage :(. On the plus side, the boyfriend and I are going to cook dinner together, which I'm looking forward to :).